Recently I set some parenting goals and was surprised
with what I learned. One of my goals was to connect with each child daily, and
ideally for at least ten minutes per child. That may not sound like much but
with several children and busy schedules, it added up. And it helped me see how
often a few children received much more than ten minutes, while others were hit
and miss, depending on the day.
First, I learned not to feel guilty about not having more
time but to enjoy the time I did spend with each child. And I consciously did!
What became ideal for me was to love in the moment—“mini loves”, such as a
text, a smile, a conversation, a hug, etc. And doing them right then: after
school, as we made dinner together, sitting on my bed while other children
gathered for family prayer, etc. It didn’t have to be a big block of time, but
with consistent “mini love” connections throughout the day.
Second, I also thoroughly enjoyed one-on-one time. This
wasn’t daily, but divided up into several smaller time chunks during the week.
What terrific memory makers! My thirteen-year-old son had entered a First
Chapter novel contest for a teen author boot camp. Can I tell you how fabulous
it was to share that experience together? He wrote the text, then I helped him
revise it, and we mutually enjoyed the collaboration. This interspersed
one-on-one time also motivated me, though tired, to make peppermint scones with
my I-love-to-bake daughter who is nine. We had a great time, chatting and
mixing a simple kids’ recipe, and the family loved the results.
Lastly, I looked at their love-share like our
pediatrician told me to view my children’s nutrition—by the week! If one child
received thirty minutes of attention one day, it worked fine to focus on
another child more fully the next, but still give the first one mini loves. The
kids seemed more satiated due to the larger time chunks of togetherness, and
were more easily satisfied with the mini loves in the meantime.
Congratulate yourself on all the good you do as a mother.
And consider ways you can increase your one-on-one time chunks with your
children, as well as their daily “mini loves.”
Author Connie Sokol is a mother of seven, a national and local
presenter, and a regular speaker at Education Week. She is a monthly
contributor on KSL TV “Studio 5,” and regular blogger for KSL "Motherhood
Matters." She is a former TV and radio host for Bonneville Communications,
and columnist for Deseret News and Utah Valley Magazine. Mrs. Sokol is the
author of several books including the award-nominated romance Caribbean
Crossroads, the 8-week Challenge program of Faithful, Fit & Fabulous, Life
is Too Short for One Hair Color Series, as well as talk CDs and podcasts. Mrs.
Sokol marinates in time spent with her family and eating decadent treats.
Life is Too Short Collection
Are you looking for a fabulous life boost today?
The Life is Too Short series is just what you need.
Written by Connie Sokol—mother of seven, author, speaker, and amazing matching
sock finder—these humorous self-development columns give you just the right
amount of fun and functional.
Originally written for a major newspaper and magazines,
you can now enjoy the entire collection in one book.
Put your feet up and laugh as you relate to time-tested
tips on being a woman, wife, and mother. You'll learn the cozy stuff of how to
adjust expectations, have faith in your dreams, and lighten up in motherhood.
And, you'll learn a few life skills such as easy spring cleaning, simplifying
the holidays, and creating successful goals.
It's the perfect gift for any woman!
Short, funny, insightful, these quick power columns are
ideal anytime, anywhere, to rejuvenate your mind and soul.
No comments:
Post a Comment